Bridal shows…

Mandrina and I went to a bridal show today.

It was my idea, I’m not complaining. Much.

But I wanted to share my creepy experience with all of you.

So I’m at this bridal show, with maybe a dozen or two other guys. Most people there were women. Brides-to-be, friends, mothers, what have you. I felt a little excluded. I can deal, don’t get me wrong, but it definitely wasn’t targetting the male demographic.

Mandrina and I sit down early for the fashion show — the main reason we went, she needs to pick out bridesmaids dresses — and are flipping through the little “magazine” they give you when you arrive. Free gift. Ignore the fact that it cost you money to get into someplace where they’ll try to get you to spend more money, just go with it.

I’m looking past Mandrina for a moment, and see the bride-to-be two seats down turned to a particular page in the magazine. Now, I don’t remember the name of the place advertized, “Centerfolds,” maybe. But it’s advertised as being Seattle’s ONLY all-male strip club.

I blink.

We’re here to talk about all the romance and planning that goes into a wedding… and they’re advertising strippers.

And only male ones!

Lack of gender equality aside, I was still a little surprised. I steal the magazine from Mandrina’s control, and flip to the page. Weird. We go back to looking through the magazine.

A little bit later, the announcer comes out. “Entertains” us for a few minutes. Then it’s time to start the show.

A semi-muscular, bald-headed African American man comes out in a Flamengo (is that the style?) dancer costume. A moment later, an attractive woman comes out. And they start dancing. I’m no one to judge, but she’s pretty good. He’s WAY too into it, though. Think, “shaking it like you just don’t care.” He’s OVERLY enthusiastic.

His dance partner goes back inside, and then the Parade of Gowns starts. He stays out, and does these “longing” poses with kneeling stretching bows.

He looks vaguely familiar. Memory clicks.

I flip back to the Centerfolds ad.

Yup. The main companion for the bridal models is the featured stripper from the club.

Explains his dancing. Explains the fact that he had cowboy chaps the next time he came on the stage. Explains the sailor costume.

Doesn’t explain to ME why he was there, but…

It was just plain WEIRD.

When I think Bridal Show, I don’t tend to think “stripper practice.”

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  1. Moira says:

    HA!!!

    you never know when the opportunity to audition a stripper will arise…

  2. Andrew says:

    Well, he gets an A+ for dancing. And a C+ for completeness of his costumes, although I think I would have liked a schoolgirl outfit, or maybe a cheerleader’s costume. Just would have spoken to me better.

    And an F in turning me on.

    Oh well, better luck next time!